• wannabe_mom

Mother's Day Grief & Bitterness

I wrote a post last year around this time titled, "How to Celebrate Your Infertile Friend on Mother's Day." Read it.


I was going to just re-share what I wrote last year, but that's not my truth this year. And honesty has always been my directive with this blog, so here is my truth.

 

This Mother's Day, I'm bitter.


I didn't think I'd be writing another post about the agony of Mother's Day.

But here I am.


We did our 8th (and final) IUI a couple weeks ago.

It failed.


(Another post for another day.)

 

Sometimes I wonder,

how much more my heart can take

and how many pieces are left to break

before it all becomes

a dusting of nothingness

that falls through the cracks of my fingers,

like holding liquid in my hands.

 

I don't have any words of wisdom or tips or humor to share with you this year when it comes to Mother's Day.


It's another solid reminder of my clear desire to be what I am not. It's like a pesky fly reminding me of everyone who has what I don't.


And it totally, eff-ing sucks.

 

This Mother's Day, I'm going to love on my mom (who I am so lucky to have) and pray that some day I will have a child who will love on me. If you're struggling like me, I see you. You're not alone.

 

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there. Soak it up - you are one of the lucky ones.



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