You want us to do WHAT?!
At this point, I knew we needed to start thinking about seeing a doctor about our problems conceiving. I had no idea where to start or if we needed a referral to a specialist, so I made an appointment for both of us to chat with my regular doctor.
Now, let me paint this picture for you. My doctor is an eccentric woman, and I absolutely love her for it. She is the type who is going to tell you how it is and not beat around the bush. I've been seeing her for years and years, but this appointment was the first time Brian met her.
We tell her what's going–how we've been tracking everything like crazy people, how we make sure to have sex at the right time. I pulled up my handy dandy app on my phone that I used for tracking and show her:
"See? We did it this day and this day and this day and I was fertile that day and I had a little spotting this day but then we had a negative pregnancy test this day..."
Her response was something along the lines of: stop stressing, try to relax, stop with all the meticulous tracking, blah blah blah.
OK, here's where it gets good.
"Listen–here's what you gotta do. You need to start j******* o** every other day."
And, in case he didn't understand what she meant, she then proceeded to make the motion with her hand.
I could literally feel the mortification oozing off of the man sitting next to me and could definitely read his mind. I am 100% positive he was thinking, "Holy cow, who is this woman and why is she telling me this...and did she just do the hand thing?"
I had to stifle back a fit of laughter to make it through the rest of the visit.
The gist from the appointment:
I need to stop with the madwoman tracking and relax
Brian needs to do his thing every other day to keep his swimmers fresh + walk around in mesh shorts without undies on + don't wear tightie whities (good thing my hubby is a boxer type of guy)
If we're not pregnant in 6 months (!) come back and we'll talk next steps
I was a bit bewildered (as you probably expect) by this first appointment. We have to wait ANOTHER six months? And Brian has to do this thing, but he already has a low libido because all of this trying-to-have-a-baby thing is stressing him out.
Hmmmm, how exactly is this going to work...?